Monday, January 19, 2009

What Not to Say to A Woman Who Doesn't Have Kids

  1. So, when are you going to have kids?
  2. Are you catching the bug/itch?
  3. Don't you want to have kids?
  4. Why don't you have a baby yet?
  5. We weren't even trying, and we got pregnant.
  6. [Insert any complaint about being pregnant or having a baby here.]
  7. We had sex once and got pregnant.
  8. It will happen in God's timing.
  9. How many kids do you plan to have?
  10. You haven't been trying for that long yet. Give it time.

Whether or not this woman is struggling with infertility, remember:

  • It's none of your business.
  • You don't understand what she's going through (it's different for each woman).

What you should say:

  • If you need someone to listen, I will.
  • Can I pray for you?

If you are struggling with infertility--this book helped me: "Moments For Couples Who Long For Children" by Ginger Garrett. Oh, and if you need someone to listen, I will. And, I am praying for you.

1 comment:

Wendy said...

AMEN! Having been through this myself, I could tell you amazingly insensitive things people said to was one of the hardest experiences of my life. Even now, after three kids, those memories are still painful.